MY CIRCUMCISION AT THE AGE OF 71

Currently, as of the year 2009, circumcision is being evaluated by doctors and other health professionals across the country to determine its true value, and whether or not it is actually necessary. Many doctors, other health professionals, and people in all walks of life, believe that circumcision is totally unnecessary, a waste of time and money, and in fact could cause trauma to newborn infant boys.

Those people who argue against circumcision, were undoubtedly circumcised as infants, and have no understanding of what life is like as an adult, uncircumcised male. (In the event that the word “male” seems redundant in connection with the word “circumcision,” bear in mind the fact that females have also been circumcised as an extreme, Muslim, barbaric, religious practice.)

I lived as an uncircumcised male for seventy-one years, and as of July, 2009, I've lived life as a circumcised male for nine months. Circumcised is better. But better yet is to be circumcised as a newborn infant, because although there is some temporary pain to the child, the pain is soon forgotten. Ask any circumcised male if he remembers his circumcision as a two-day old infant.

Periodically throughout my life, I have had irritating, minor infections in that area that I have been able to control myself with medicated powders and other medicated creams. That is, until I experienced an infection that I could not control at the tender age of seventy-one. After fighting the infection for nearly a year, and after my doctor recommended that I get a circumcision, I finally decided it was time.

One other time in my life, when I was having an unusually difficult time with an infection, a doctor recommended that I have a circumcision. I was in my mid-20’s at the time, and was understandably not pleased with the idea of a circumcision, so I continued to fight the infection myself. Eventually, I won that particular round, and the infection went away.

Now I realize that I should have had the operation performed when I had the initial recommendation from my doctor in my 20’s. I would have saved myself a lot of grief and irritation over the years. Better yet, I should have had the operation as an infant. But I think circumcising infants was not too popular in 1937. Four years later, my baby brother was circumcised, so it may have been more acceptable to perform the operation on infants by 1941.

Another reason may have been that the stock market crash and accompanying poor economy in the 1930’s, caused my parents to be very concerned about where the money would come from for a “not totally necessary” circumcision. My dad was one of the few “lucky” ones who was fortunate enough to get to work three days a week in the 1930’s, but the meager income from his short work weeks in those days was needed for food and the other necessities of life for the family. Money was scarce, and it could not be frittered away on an unnecessary circumcision. But I digress.

The main problem with getting a circumcision as an adult, is, of course, the discomfort and pain that is experienced following the operation. As I mentioned earlier, my operation was nine months ago, and it’s only been very recently that I have been comfortable wearing “tighty whiteys.” Maybe the difference in the “size and scope” of the operation, so to speak, between an infant and an adult has something to do with the amount of pain. But that is only my uneducated opinion. I am not a doctor, although I once pretended to be one as a child. And again I digress.

A Navy buddy of mine had to have a circumcision while aboard ship (circa 1956) and I recall that he experienced pain and discomfort for a long period. Being reminded of that in my 20’s, after being recently discharged from the Navy, probably contributed to my anxiety about the operation as an adult. As I found out many years later, I had reason to be anxious.

Today, I believe I would have been a better sexual partner to my honey had I opted for the operation earlier in life. It is my opinion that uncircumcised males don't “last as long,” as circumcised males do. I won't go into the reason for my belief in this phenomenon, just accept the statement on it’s face value.

Returning to my original comment regarding the current disagreement among health professionals on the value of infant circumcision, it is my contention that only adults who have been circumcised as an adult should be permitted to vote on the matter. My argument for this position is not unlike a now-forgotten politician’s argument some years ago on the subject of birth control, when he told Pope John Paul II, “you no playa da game, you no maka da rules,” on the subject. (The comment, while being somewhat derogatory to Italians who speak English, was also ironic in that Pope John Paul II was the first non-Italian Pope since 1530.)

The politician in question took a lot of flak from the Catholic Church for his rather crude statement, but the fact is, the statement was a fair comparison.

I will now leave this rather unpleasant subject with my concluding statement: “A foreskin is a breeding ground for bacteria, and the Jews are right.”